Advice needed to save my marriage?

I am a married mother of a 14 month old. I have been with my husband for 6 years but married for only 2 of those years. Lately I have been feeling myself pulling away from my husband. The spark just isn't there anymore. This is where it gets tricky. My husband introduced me to his coworker who had previously stated that he thought I was fairly attractive. At first I didn't feel anything for him but as time goes on I feel myself getting more and more attracted to him. I asked him if he would have an affair with me and he politely declined, saying he would never do that to my husband. I cannot get him out of my mind. I see this man only once a week if that but I feel such a strong connection between us. I want my husband but I think we need to take a break. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.Advice needed to save my marriage?
You are still in post-partum depression, and hon, always, for the whole of your life there will always be temptations ALWAYS...... attractive women have no problem attracting men. Now you certainly can pursue these, and we have names for women who do this.... but a bit of advise on what marriage is, and what you can do to make it better.





Marriage is Respect, Admiration, Passion and Trust. And, hon, the betrayal of trust by adultery is the deal buster in a marriage... and when your partner finds out,,,,,, that you have shared your body and soul with another, it isn't long before the first three erode, even with counseling. You cannot unscramble an egg. You are married, hon, but you are not blind, nor dead,fantasies are free, but should remain as such... Your husband is not blind, nor dead either... but, .... Would you wish him to share himself with another woman, then put it in you??? Doesn't that just make you want to vomit? Doesn't that just make your skin crawl?? Wouldn't you feel empty, as if someone had torn out your heart? Well hello. Your husband would as well. So, if you wish to remain married to this man, behave yourself. The man of whom you are speaking has more good sense than do you in turning you down..... take a hint.





Marriages always can use some spicing up. Order from Amazon.com ';For you both'; by Lonnie Barbach, THE sex therapist in the country today. Get some of her other stuff as well.





Good friend a marriage counselor for 30 years. When we have lunch, I hear about her cases. This is what she would have written to you...Advice needed to save my marriage?
The ';strong'; connection is ONLY you imagination. Obviously, he's not connected if he didn't cheat with you. How can you do that to your husband? At least have the guts to come clean with him and tell him that things aren't right and you feel distant. At least resolve your current situation before cheating with another. What happened to ';...for better or for worse...';?
If you are married and your husband loves you and gives you compliments, why would you want to ruin your marriage, it is never greener on the other side, there is always more grass to cut. Marriage is a covenant with God.....may God help you through these lustful thoughts....in Jesus mighty name...amen
I think you are responding more to the fact that you feel your marriage needs work than you are to this new man. It seem as if you are needing some affirmation that you are attractive, and that you can ';get'; somebody if you want them----but the truth is, whatever is disturbing you in your marriage will follow you if you don't deal with it. I suggest that you talk with your husband, and share with him that you feel distant from him. Ask him if he has sensed it and get his feelings--he's entitled to have input into your relationship as well. And, until you sort that out, I wouldn't ask someone you hardly know to have an affair with you, only because it will muddy things up so much that you will be even more confused. Be straightforward and honest with your partner, the father of your child....and give yourself a chance to figure out what is missing from that relationship.
You should run, not walk, to marriage counseling. There is something going on to make you disrespect your hubby by asking his coworker to have an affair with you. You gave that coworker too much power in your marriage.





The spark can burn uncontrolable to non exsistent in a marriage. After 7 years of marriage I know. The thing is that you need to figure out what is going on with you to make you not bother trying to reignite it.
First of all- Are you only concerned with saving your marriage since the other guy turned you down???





You need to TALK to your husband and tell him how you are feeling. You also need to do some serious thinking yourself and determine what it is you feel that you are missing and that way you can tell him how to help you.





Taking a break just so you can sleep with other people is not a ';break'; what you are asking for is basically a get out of guilt free card.





I think you need to do some serious thinking because I know if I had a family and someone I was with for so long ( I was with my ex husband for 10 years, and he threw our marriage away ) I wouldn't take it for granted. Especially when it would hurt him by being with someone he knows.
An affair isn't the answer. Talk to your husband, seek marriage counselling, try spicing things up (inside and outside the bedroom) but remain faithful. Perhaps you're just getting bored by the routine? The comfort of a long term relationship is great, but just like an iPod playlist, sometimes you need to add a new song to the list. Same applies to marriage. Do something to change things up a bit (not cheating though, haha). Trust is something that few can get back once it's gone, and if you really love your husband, I don't think that's a risk you should be willing to take.
Well, his coworker has already declined to take you up on your offer. It isn't uncommon for couples to get into a rut with such a young one around the house. When you said that the other man found you ';attractive'; that obviously appealed to you. Like most affairs they usually occur because of how the individual feels about themselves when they are with the other person. An affair isn't the way to go ever and the recovery from such a betrayal lasts longer than the actual affair will. Don't do this for your sake, your child's and your husbands. Decide how unhappy you are in the marriage. Perhaps the wiser course would be to just set yourself and him free. If you find that you are unwilling to do that then you will have proven to yourself that a very deep part of you wants this marriage. Try to do something more positive to feel better about yourself. If necessary go back to work if you are at home or go back to school and take a few classes, join the gym, volunteer etc...


If you pursue an affair with anyone you will be giving your husband the ammunition he will need to have you declared unfit and you could wind up losing your daughter as well. Maybe you should also consider getting your hormones checked and maybe some anti-anxiety medication so that you won't be so fixated on doing what in your heart you know is wrong. Ask yourself if your husband were to have an affair with a coworker or anyone and used the justification you gave above as the incentive and you found out. Would you be okay with that? If not then try to concentrate on how you would feel and whenever that inappropriate feeling arises. If your answer is you wouldn't care then your marriage is already over and you should set him free so that you both can be with people whom you both appreciate and respect enough not to betray. Good Luck!
Your husband's coworker won't f*ck you out of respect for your husband but you're still willing to cheat on the father of your child? That coworker must think you are a sleazy Ho. Be glad he didn't tell your husband. You're pathetic.
My advice to you is to work on your relationship with your husband first, before you go out and do anything that you will regret. Your marriage should be your first priority (after kids), and you should always be working to improve upon it. There are so many things that you can do in order to bring the spark back into your relationship with your husband. Do something nice for him, dress up sexy for him, have sex in and unexpected place. I understand most of these things are hard to get done when you have children, but you have to find the time to make your marriage work. Personally, I don't think you would be satisfied if you had an affair with your husband's coworker. Your husband loves you, whereas the coworker does not. Think about this very hard before pursuing anything. I wish you luck in your journey.
maybe your felling that way since you had a child and your husband isn't giving it to you like he use to and the only other guy that you have contact with is your husbands coworker and you're trying to make something happen thats not going to happen he already declined your invite get him out of your head and work on getting your husband back in bed. and please dont start cheating on your husband .
I think maybe after having a child and that brought you down, does your husband ever complement you how you look that could be the problem, knowing that his co worker did and not him. I would say maybe if you and your husband really love each other. maybe your mom or his can watch the little one while you two get away. and to be by yourself. or maybe go to a marriage counslor. but I wouldn't give up your marriage try and make it work. talk to your husband and tell him how your feelings. good luck.
well i think the best thing you can do is talk to your husband and before you go so fare try to thing about your futur and also your childs, because its easy to go away from one but its not easy to be happy with out your child i mean when yoo go away from your husband so your after sometime your child will be apart from you because you have to send him his/her father too, a child need both father and mothers love, not ones a father/mother alone will never give a child love of both parents . So plzzzz think about it its very importent. its about your live and futur . Or maybe you love he other man but what about him? can you live w铆th out his love? would he accept you and your child?. i think you will better understand what i am saying and you are a mother you will never do any thing worng with your childs futur. any ways i hope you dont mind it it was my point of veiw. good luck.
If you were a man asking this question, you'd be a dog loser.
You need counselling. teher is no need to outsource your emoptional and physical needs while married, so I believe that your marriage is suferring from disconnection. Are you depressed? It sounds to me like postpartum depression.





Honestly, you don't sound right. Go to a therapist to find out why do you feel this way.





Good luck
Married for 2 years and already asking guys to have an affair with you. Great.


I advise you have an affair. Then tell your husband. If he doesn't divorce you, do it again. And again. Until finally he leaves you.


Just because someone knows you are doing something stupid doesn't mean we haven't dealt with real life! I have been in a relationship for 11 years, married 7, 2 kids....I have never cheated or propositioned another woman. Have I been tempted to? Sure I am human. But my sense of right and wrong rules, not my selfish needs. When things are getting tough the solution is to work it out not fill the void with some fling.


Grow up. Your husband doesn't deserve to have a cheating wife.
Woman, you're just asking for trouble....Ofcourse you are pulling away because of this man telling you all these things that you wanted to hear.....Have some dignity and respect. If not for your husband atleast for your child.....If you want a break from your husband, go somewhere and leave his coworker alone... do not entertain that thought.
If you're going to have an affair, choose a man who isn't your husband's coworker. Preferably someone out of town, lol.
talk to your husband about the way you feel, try to get that spark back, and if it dosn't work get a divoce first. than date the coworker. but cheating in a marriage is just wrong............
no what you want is your cake and eat it to. your saying that you need a break and therefore you would be able to sleep with this other guy because your not with your husband, you cant have it both ways. if your no longer in love with your husband and want out then leave him. but don't think your fooling anyone by saying you think you need a break. trust me the guy you have the hotts for is not going to by it either.
You need get away from this man (the one you want to have an affair with). You need to work on your marriage and forget about this guy. This is very wrong and you need to stop...I feel really bad for you. have you thought about counseling? Or start from the beginning...have you talked to your husband about this spark. i think having an affair is going to ruin your life...your husband, your child...you are being very selfish!! Think about your family!
Your husband is losing you and you need to tell him.