Cant stay in my marriage and can't go.......the pressure is awful.....pray for me... advice?

I have had a difficult marriage for 23 years. We were both Christians of a sort when we married and I became saved but he did not. In fact, the difficulties we have faced have made me draw nearer to Christ and made my husband's heart grow hard. He is angry and lashes out at me daily. I thought it was my duty to stand by him and continue to pray for us, for him, for reconciliation and God's will. I have been doing that for years. I finally decided that all that effort was just me helping the holy spirit and also me rewarding bad behavior (the worse he acts the more apt I have been to make him a nice dinner, buy him some sports gadget he wants/tool, etc.). So my Christian side says thats what long suffering means---and I accept it. I also read that I am to continue to forgive and to continue to act like Christ. The counselor side of me says I am a codependent who needs to stop this, get an attorney and move on so that I can be of service to others, myself and God. Help?Cant stay in my marriage and can't go.......the pressure is awful.....pray for me... advice?
Talk to your pastor he knows you better and will be able to give you the best advice.Cant stay in my marriage and can't go.......the pressure is awful.....pray for me... advice?
First of all, yes, I will pray for you. This is a difficult place you are in. You are miserable, yet you want to do as God would have you do. Well, here are some verses out of I Corinthians to consider:





(Chapter 7: 10-11) ';And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.';





(Chapter 7: 12-16) But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?';





I am not going to tell you what I think those verses mean. God can lead you into knowing what to do. Just tell Him the way it is. I do know that God blesses obedience. God knows what you are going through. But know that whatever you decide, you need to have peace about it. I will pray that God would lead you to know what to do and give you peace about the decision. May God bless you.
I will definitely pray for you. I know divorce is never a good thing to resort to and you know that is sinning agents God. I think you should let God guard your heart and have him guide u through this struggle.
You can rely on God and His word, which is never wrong, or you can rely on your own understanding, which clearly has its shortcomings.


Find a Biblical counselor for the both of you.
As an atheist, you may not want to hear this, but to just back what I have heard from so many Christians when it comes down to a question that you may not want to answer. Maybe it is all part of your God's plan. That way you can blame it on your God and do what you want and not really have to think about it. It gives you a very convenient way out.
you need to bump that zero an get ya self a hero.
Sorry to hear your situation.. You know, there is a chance that you can pray, relinquish all your problems for God to intervene, and nothing will happen. I've been through this situation myself, and finally decided to make matters into my own hands. I was fed up, and didn't want to live like that anymore. I was afraid that I was going against God, and I would fail but I left anyway. I empowered myself, and I am better off than I was before. I wouldn't change a thing, and have not looked back. I sat there for years waiting for God to save our marriage, and this was not the case. Maybe your husband needs to lose what is valuable for him to see that he needs a positive change in his life? Maybe you were there to so your spouse would know about God, and that was his big chance to turn to God? Hanging on to a marriage where 1 person is working on the marriage instead of 2 is not a marriage, and I see no reason for you to suffer because of him.
this is one of the things i don't like about religion.





whatever religion you are you weren't put here to be abused or treated like dirt. you can and should leave if you're being abused.





you talk about long suffering....i think 23 years is plenty long.





i will keep you in my thoughts.


good luck and bright blessing to you.
As a divorced man I truly feel for you. I would suggest to do anything in your power to get marriage counselling, that may even be to tell him how much he stands to lose if you are divorced. The bright side is many who get counselling find a stronger and happier marriage than they ever had before. I wish you the best of luck only use divorce as the very last option. God bless and good luck.
I have been married for 18 years and it can be very hard.


The Bible is definitely the place to go for help with your marriage. I would like to share some articles with you that I found helpful. You will find the scriptural references throughout the article. I hope you can pick out some helpful information.


http://www.watchtower.org/e/200607/artic鈥?/a>
he lashes out on you daily.


if its physical call the police thats domestic violence.
you don't have to martyr yourself to be a good Christian. You can forgive him for his faults and behavior, and divorce him and move on, from a loving place.
I will pray for you, you sound like your having it hard but hold on to your faith and ALways Always keep God near you he'll see you through and your husband is just the devil who is trying to break your spirit but countinue to hold on God will help you.
Can't stay in the marriage %26amp; can't go. Why are you using the word ';can't';. Your feet still work don't they??? You are the only one stopping yourself. Why not separate at least temporarily and seek counselling? It won't be easy but why remain with an abuser. Contact your local shelter because verbal abuse is the first step to physical abuse.
I don't believe your religion requires you to live a life of misery. You need a support system in real life (not here) and you need to either get counseling with your husband or leave him. Good luck.