What's your advice for young marriages?

My boyfriend and I have been going out for a year and 3 months. I'll be 18 tomorrow and he'll be 20 in April. We've been through sooooo much, I can't even tell you. We became fairly good friends for a while before we started going out and we love each other very much. We plan on moving out together next year after he turns 21 and I get at least one year getting my college freshman experience. He's my best friend and the one I turn to for everything. He's proposed twice but we decided to wait and build our relationship. Two nights ago I felt like he was going to again, but he didn't and it was fine. We're getting closer and closer everyday and I would love to marry him. We're still young, but I'd like to know what you think? Anyone who's married young, what's it like?





Thanks :)





Oh, I'm pretty mature for my age. I've handled alot that's come my way, if it helps in your advice giving.What's your advice for young marriages?
Stick to your plan of waiting until he turns 21 and you go to college for a year, BEFORE you get married, live together for sure. Alot of things can happen, you are still VERY young and growing and changing. Do not hurry and get married... what's meant to be will be, don't rush it though. I think it is great you are so in love, but you are really young, and life may have another plan for you. Sounds like you have a good plan in place. If you feel he is going to propose and you are nervous about it, talk to him about it. Communication is the key to marriage and you need to be able to express your concerns now, it doesn't just come easy when you get married, in fact it is harder. Alot harder. So talking to him about it now will be a good test of your love. If you both want to be more committed, for security or whatever, maybe a promise ring? Maybe old fashion, but alot safer than getting married too young.What's your advice for young marriages?
I think it's great that you are so in love. And there are many, many happy and successful marriages that started out when the two people were very young. However... My only word of caution is get your education finished first. By all means be together, love each other, enjoy eachother, but finish your schooling before you start having children. It's the best thing for you, him and any future babies you may have. In the long run it will make life easier and better for all of you, and it will help ensure that you stay happy together.
While it is possible to make this work unfortunately it is not likely. No offense but even though you have been through a lot you are still young and will go through more. You both will grow and may find out that you are no longer right for one another. It is really tough to be married at 18 and 19. You are smart to give yourself a year to try college first. I married at 27 but am so glad that I didn't sooner because now I know I would never have been ready for it in my early 20's. Like you I was ';in love'; in highschool and thought I would marry that boy. While I look back on him fondly I know that it never would have worked between us. I am a completely different person now and I'm sure he is also. My parents were married at 18 and for 20 years but it wasn't happy and they ended up divorcing after all that time. I'm not saying that it definately won't work for you, you never know, but the best advice I can give you is to take care of yourself and live your life with and without him. Don't rush to live together or get married, time will tell if your are truly meant to. Good luck, I know it is hard to not know what will come.
My top 10 rules for working marriages.





(This is not to imply that these apply to everyone. And everything that is involved in the breakdown in my own marriage can be related to not following one or more entries on this list by either my wife, or myself.)





1. Open and honest communication between you both.


2. Unwavering trust in each other.


3. Unconditional love. (this is the most important IMHO, the love of each other without the desire to change each other)


4. Good Sex or lovemaking or F*cking, however you want to phrase it. It's important and don't let anyone tell you differently.


5. Reliability on each other. Be reliable to him and vice versa. You'll need each other to lean on from time to time.


6. Faithfulness. No cheating ever. And if the urge to do so hits, see rule #1.


7. Compromise.


8. Respect.


9. Income. This may sound frivolous or materialistic of me, but so what. It's true. If you try to survive off the fruits of love, you will starve. Love doesn't put food on the table or make the mortgage payment.


10. Faith. Not in God, but in each other, in your love.





That's what I think anyways. I wish you both the best.
Youre still both really young. My grandparents got married when they were both 17 and they lasted until my grandfather died aged 75. So I guess it depends on the people involved. Do it for the right reasons though.
just live together for a couple of years and see how it goes then.
No matter what age it is a cr*p shoot. It might work. I was 25 and it lasted a year. I had a friend that married at 18 and in now going on 35 years together. My advice is get school out of the way. Shack-up and have a blast. Marry when it all comes together.
I'm sorry, I didn't read your whole question but when it comes to marriage at your age, DON'T DO IT!





If you must, live with him for at least two years and then if you still like the marriage thing then do it. You know what they say about divorce don't you?





';You know why divorce is so expensive? Cause it's worth it.';
I was married at 19 (it's going on 6 yrs now) and the only thing I can say is dating is not like marriage. I've know a lot of people that loved each other to no end got married and it was like who is this person....I've told friends that if you're dating someone and you move in with that person it's work now times that by 100 and you have marriage. something happens when you say I do it's just different not always bad but there will be days when you want to hurt your spouse lol.
Stay strong, stay honest, stay friends, stay faithful. Don't go to bed angry. Always talk. Don't let lines of communication break down. Don't let finances come between you and don't be petty over little mistakes.


A family that prays together. stays together.
Your first mistake is not accepting the marriage proposal. Accepting a marriage proposal it a declaration of an intent. The setting of the wedding day can be 5 years down the road. Perhaps you did not know this. From the time that a marriage is proposed, the male has to start building for the future.





Your time could be used to secure jobs, and finance. The two of you working hand in hand for a brighter future. This is when you will fine out if the male is thinking with his head or his other body parts. Buying a house, and fixing it up can be done. (Living together is a bad idea) Sex before marriage, is a choice but living together is learning too much too fast on both sides.





Swing the conservation back around to the marriage proposal, accept, and start exploring together the possibilities of the future. Make sure that seeds are planted that will anchor your future life (Job planing, House-Home, expectations).
it the man is ready to grow up then it,s a good thingbut make shore her is ready to not stray to a yonger girl.
its like this, do you not go swimming cause you are afraid of the water, or do you dive right in. the only way your marriage will fail is if you want everything and dont give him sh it.be fair and dont nag him to death. love will take care of the rest
I married when I was 23 its a little tough especially if neither of you have lived with someone of the opposite sex. You might want to test drive first. The key is division of labor. You have to run the marriage like a country. Checks and balances, stuff like that. The number one rule of marriage. Never try to change the other person.
well i think from what i read with or without marriage you guys will be together. why are you waiting? waiting to move in together? maybe you should move in together first to make sure you guys can handle that.
You might want to explore the waters before jumping the broom.
DO NOT DO IT!!!
dont do it
the only advice the i can give is to take your time and think about everything before you decide anything together. talk and comunicated all the time
It's easy be carefull about the things you do you need to have a nice job because the economy is not good so you should think about that first because if it dosen't work out you still have your job and good luck you may need it alot!!!!!!!
Maturity is good. Maturity allows you to understand that you have not had enough life experience, which comes only through putting time in, to marry.





I married young, I so wish I hadn't. Love has nothing to do with it either. You need to depend upon yourself, rely upon yourself and the decisions you make. Once you marry you will never be able to make another decision just for yourself, because that would be selfish and that is not what marriage is about.





Rethink the whole marriage thing, and the moving in together idea as well. Get your own place, get a room mate if you have to but don't move your boyfriend in just yet, until you live on your own you will never know whether or not you really want to live with someone.





You may find out you like your life, your freedom, and at 18, you don't even know who you are yet. You know who you have been, as a child and teen (maturity aside), you have no idea who you are as an adult and you need to give yourself time to find out.





Just FYI, every person who has ever turned 21 has been through a lot in their life. We all think we have been through so much more than other people our age, but it isn't true, we are just so focused on ourselves we don't take the time to find out what other people have gone through.





Give yourself time. Or, move in with your boyfriend and lose your youth, your freedom, and the ability to develop a personality of your own.
Just make sure you know its the right thing. I have found that young couples I know that marry so young, feel they missed out on life as they get older, they were only w/ one person, they didnt experience life, they don't know if they truly love someone or not because they know nothing but that person's love. I dont know a lot of young couples whose marriage lasted but that doesnt mean yours wont. If the person you are w/ is the person you would die for, do anything for, love more than life itself, then you are w/ the right person. It took me 30 years to find the love of my life and I made a lot of mistakes early on. I applaude your williness to wait, it does show maturity. Also, college is important. Make sure before you say I DO, you have a job and security. Fiances can be something that come between two people very fast. Good luck to you. Email me if you ever need to talk!!
Don't do it. u will regret it It is a big mistake!
Wow...I would NEVER suggest that anyone get married at 18. Why? Because most people haven't found their true love at this age. And trust me it can take a while...also you haven't lived or experienced much. I am not suggesting sleeping around for 10 years then get married, but things have changed a lot and I just don't think most people today are ready for marriage at such a young age. And what appeals to you at 18 will more than likely diminish as you get older...For instance, there were things that I liked at 18 and 19 that I literally find disgusting in my 30s.
Happy Birthday!





Marriage can be hard.





One thing you have to keep in mind is you have to compromise. You have to give as well as take.





Money is also a big issue in new marriages. Just because you have two incomes doesn't necessarily mean you will have extra money coming out of your ears. Always take care of things financially together.





Talk to each other. This will keep you both on the same page.





I hope things work out for you. Just don't rush it. If it is meant to be it will.





Good Luck!
Don't listen to the other people answering this question. Love does not know age. If you truly feel like he is the one, then go for it.





I would say that one consideration you might want to make is whether or not it will affect your school or professional life in a negative manner. If not, follow your heart!
I'm 18 and my fiance is 19.


He is in the marine corp and we are getting married in July. We have been together for 4 years. There is nothing wrong with young marriages, just be sure that they're the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with.
I think you should at least be somewhat financially secure first before making an marriage commitment...and keeps the kids out till you guys are at least established in your chosen careers (babys are not cheap!)





Just get engaged first...for a year or so...then get married once you've settled into some sort of routine, if he's serious about you then he's not going anywhere.





And advice for marriage? Spend time together, have fun. Don't be angry at night before you come to bed...let pride go. Spend as much time with friends as with eachother so that things don't get dull...








and Go marriage counselling before tying the knot!
dont do it!!!!!!!!!
please dont marry just yet! i done that with my first boyfriend we met wen i was 15 him 16 got married at 18 and i had a baby i missed out on so much i wanted to be young and have good times with my friends so i left him he was heartbroken but i needed to have fun aswell we lived far from my family ,my daughter is now 27 me and him are good friends but i do regret the marrige at so young you got to see life! first i broke his heart but he found love again and so did i
how about living together frist for at least 12 months and then see how ya'll feel about marriage....most marriages made when one is a teenager end in divorce