Please save my marriage life...please I require ur genuine advice?

I'm married since 11mths and have a 1mth old baby.my husbnd and I r 8yrs difference old-arranged marriage.I live in my inlaws place.He is vry much family attached.We have not enjoyed life as a newly married couple bcoz he spends most of the time with his family,sister and her children.I want him2spend time with me.He lovs me as a wife but at the same time he shares his lov with evr1.I've not enjoyed a life as any girl expects as we dont get enof privacy.I gues tis is natural with any girl.I lov him and he lovs me too.But the problem is these disturbances affect our life.Now he has started2drink and smoke(he already had tis habits befor marriage but had stopped it for me).I kno it is gud2lov his family but he don't spend time specially for us(me%26amp;baby).I also told him that we wil live separately and wil visit inlaws place once a week.but he is stuborn tat he wil not come frm his family.(he sacrificed his lover as his famil dint acept).Pls hlp me wit advice on how2lead a happy life..plsPlease save my marriage life...please I require ur genuine advice?
is he really ready to have a family? i think hes not yet.. he is still clinging to his parents.. i really think also that you leave separately from now on until he realizes that he needs you too..Please save my marriage life...please I require ur genuine advice?
Be patient. Now that you have his child his attention will gradually shift from his family to you and your baby.
sadly we raise daughters on cinderella and raise boys to be selfish so women from all cultures are usually disappointed for these reasons after the reality of marriage sets in. that's not to say that you can't be happy, but you have to learn to be happy in yourself without resting your happiness on him or his approval/ love/ dedication to you.





make a good life for yourself in your child, education, career, hobbies as time permits. let him be the icing, not the cake.





good luck.
All I can say is, you have to talk to him about how you're feeling, you have to put your foot down and get him to compromise with you. Maybe even talk to his sister or mother and see if they could help you talk to him. Communication is the key to a good relationship, hun. If you can't talk to him, then I'm not sure the relationship could last long.
I know what u mean and i can totally understand your situation. The best thing to do would be to convince him that he has lived with his parents for a looooong time and now its time for you three to make your own little nest and start your independent life. in a house where you are both the man and lady of the house and you make all the decisions. but i know that most pakistani and indian men live with their parents forever and ever and ever and ever hehehehehe no offense but i just think its a very stupid cultural habit that gives rise to countless problems.


There are 2 things you can do in this situation, either convince your hubby gradually that you are suffering in that house and you want to live in a seperate house OR learn to live with this setup and take over the house by first befriending everyone and then take charge of the kitchen and then take charge of everything and become a part of the family. as for your hubby's smoking and drinking habits, i think he's retaliating coz he wanted to marry his galfriend. anyway just talk to him and try to start a loving relation with him. go out on dates, write him long love letters, take care of his every need. you have to develop a relation with him like in love marriages.
learn some good relationship skills!
dont talk like an idiot
Spending time together as a family is what you need to do. You need to arrange to go places, and if it's somewhere you can't take the baby then find someone to look after it for the day. It sounds like you're leading seperate lives and that's not healthy if you are married. I guess being an arranged marriage is not ideal as you did not become friends etc before you had to marry....maybe you've nothing in common.
tell him to stop his bad habbits first because if he continues he will ruin his health. tell him that he needs to spend more time with you and the baby. ask him if he cares about you. if he does he will understand what you mean. so just tell him how you feel.
i feel bad for u:(.. i really dont know what to tell u:(. talk to him